When You Need To Laugh

She is...amazing.
We start sharing pain and finish up laughing so hard that I wet my pants.
Those red hooded sweatshirts will get you every time.
How I need to be reminded what a gift laughter is.
The cheerful heart.
Good medicine.
A countenance of joy that takes my children's breath away.
Takes them by surprise.
And makes them come a runnin'.
How laughter sets the Shoulders' heart on fire.
And these friends of mine...
Oh!  May the blessing you are return a thousand fold.

You make me LAUGH!

Bernadette

Open Prayer...Join Me?

Jesus Christ, Son of God, Ruler of this one heart here, Sovereign King, Lover of all souls, bend down and hear our prayers today, Lord.

For the Lost.
For the Lonely.
For the chronically Ill.
For the Hurting.
For the Broken.
For the Captives.
For the demon Possessed.
For the Persecuted.
For the Missionary.
For the Children.
For the Children.
For the Children.
For the Soldiers fighting for freedom's sake.
For my son, Joshua.
For those Lost in a world of porn.
For the Addicted.
For the Enslaved.
For Anyone finding it difficult to know who they are in Christ.
For my Mama.
For my Dad.
For my Siblings and my Nieces and Nephews.
For your Families, Friends.
For the Seeds that have been planted for Christ these last two thousand years.
For the Kingdom of God.
For first born Sons.
For all Sons.
For Daughters.
For LIFE.
For the crushed post-abortive Woman.
For the Fathers who aren't standing their post.
For the Church and her Future.
For the WORD going forth.
For Worshipers in Spirit and Truth.
For the Harvest.
For Freedom

Amen.

Bernadette

Thanks For...

For marriage.
For children.
For friends seeing you through.
For the sun and for summer.
For swim suit tans and flip flop lines across your feet.
For cherries.
For a son home from camp.
For prayers for a soldier.
For a soldier's letters home.
For your daughter's hand and heart in yours.
For laughing at how hard things are for us!
For getting through.
For words.
For the Word.
For the very dear love of Christ for the fallen down.
For the broken and terrified.
For the lost.
For His hand always reaching out to draw us back home.
Away from the brink.
Away from the stinking sty.
He is Why.

We give thanks.

Bernadette

The Hiding Place

Sitting in sweat because I am afraid.
The terror of just being...me.
Blind trust.
She says I must rest.
But I don't know how.
When the only One I can trust is Jesus.
When my own heart is deceitful.
Full of deceit.
When iron sharpening iron hurts.
When I must hold on anyway.
Waiting on the results.
Waiting on the process.
Trusting the ultimate outcome.
And coming out of comfort zones.
Because we're not babies anymore.
And we've got to let go the Father's pant leg.
A whole hurting world out there.
That will never know love and grace and Jesus.
If we hide out in our prayer closets.
Hiding.  Fearful.  Terrified.
Instead of resting in Jesus.

Our Hiding Place,

Bernadette

On Chicks and Chickens

I have to laugh.  Really.  Because we sat out there in those broken down lawn chairs and talked as fast as we could in the time that we had.  Catching up like two school girls while we each held a stick in our hands.  Encroaching chickens, you know.  We chat and whack.

Jobs, and hurting hearts.  Cute jeans or just jeans that are long enough.  The "vacation".   Homeschooling.  Very, VERY tight spots.

Whacking chickens.

Shaking our heads in mutual sorrow.  Laughing.  Angels and prayers.  What God is really up to.  As if we could ever really know.  Planning for fun for the kids and for us.

Whacking chickens.

Sunscreen on.  More ice for cold coffee, and the kids are sure quiet in the pool today.  Sharing a letter.

Whacking chickens.

Being real.  Really.  Moving chairs to the shade, but keeping dresses pulled up high to get some sun on our Montana skin.  Ladies in dresses drinking cold coffee and...

Whacking chickens.

Bawk,

Bernadette

Keep Your World, World.

Keep your world, World.
Keep your lying tongue and your dying eyes.
Keep your empty promises.
Keep your pride and rebellion.
Keep your success.
Keep your vanity.
Keep your education.
Keep your idols.
Keep your cutting wounds.
Keep your religion.
Keep your money.
Keep your power and the kingdoms you have built.
Keep your own throne.
Keep your tolerance.
Keep your death.
Keep your world, World.

And Give Us Jesus,

Bernadette

Thankful for This

Sitting out under the late night sky watching stars wink hope.
Wearing a Soldier's sweatshirt again...so I can feel him close to my heart.
Praying for him.  Leaning into God for him.
Surrendering all that was lost and broken.
Giving my rights away and laying my life down again.
Ahhh...it feels good to follow Jesus. (Even when it hurts.)
Finding my smile again.
In Christ.
Finding my feet moving along the dusty road again.
Because of Christ.
For aunts and uncles and cousins and more cousins.
For my Grandparents and their legacy that ripples out on the water.
For getting to play in the lake like a kid again.
With my cousins and all that laughter.
About how we've become our parents.
And how we can't eat diddly anymore because it makes us all sick.
Isn't that a hoot?
For Aunt Mary: her eyes like Grandma's eyes.  A real talk.  A gift to me.
For Glacier Park and the elixir she carries in the air.
A sweetness that revives my drowning soul.
How the clouds floating at the bottom of Lake McDonald make me laugh.
Everything flipped upside down.
Everything getting flipped right side up.
The kids and I howling too late over a game of Yahtzee.
Daniel saying, "The most dangerous species alive is a hungry mother."
As I open a jar of sauerkraut for breakfast and dump it into a bowl.
Daniel saying, "The most dangerous species alive is a grandmother at the dollar store."
Laughing until we cry.
Their faces enraptured.
Joy.
Just...
Facing judgement with grace.
Facing hatred with love.
The Bible box.
The Word, Friends.
The Word.
Working through an argument by looking through the lens of the Gospel of Jesus.
The Good News that He died for me when I hated and despised Him.
When I was cruel and unkind.
When I was silent.
When I was screaming obscenities and raising my fist to His face.
"MY WAY!"
Yes.  She who has been forgiven much loves much.
So...
For my precious Savior and my priceless Salvation.
That  I love You, my Jesus.
I.  Love.  You.
For the Shoulder's hand in mine all the way home.
For a deep and grateful sigh that we've come through another one.

Because of Jesus.

Bernadette

Fears and Tear Drops

So much falling these last few weeks.
A vacation into failure, and I, too stunned to speak.
Sitting on the deck at the campground crying.
As the mountains and lake cry back God's sovereignty.
His majesty.
His glory.
His goodness.
HT1's voice on the other end of the line holding my feet to the ground.
The earth.
The fire.
When I'm terrified.
When I can't reach for His hand because... What if He let's me drop?
Oh, Good God.

Please don't drop me!

Bernadette

Thanks For YOU!

Just a note to the faithful:
I am writing.
Writing.
Writing.
Too much and too fast for this space at the moment.
Hope to pare things down.
Shrink.
Make small.
Little sips of a spinning life.
And a thank you for the kindness you all extend.
To the words that go out into space.
From my heart to yours.
Unknown friends.
Who walk with me through this strange land of cyber space.
Who hold my hand.
And breathe those resuscitating breaths right into sagging sails.

Great Cloud of Witnesses,

Bernadette