Thursday, June 20, 2013

When Your Eyes Are Growing Dim

Sometimes it seems I'm never going to grow up.

I bought a new bible.

The print is larger, and...

My eyes are growing dim.

I bought one for the Shoulder's for Father's Day.

He said if we read every word, it would be equivalent to having a bachelor's degree in theology.

I open the pages.

I close the pages.

You see?

I lied.

I have a bible exactly like this new one except the print is smaller, and...

My eyes are growing dim.

I didn't think about the cost until I had it home and in my hands.

Then...I felt kind of sick.

And when the Shoulder's saw it laying out on the table, I lied.

I said I had always had it, but that the zipper had broken on my cover.

Two lies.

Three days of misery.

And last night, I lay in our bed and cried.

I told him the truth, and it seems like I've been confessing a whole lot lately.

Stupid stuff.  Embarrassing stuff.  Thank God...

Shoulders are good for crying on, and he said we could earn our bachelor's in theology together.

I guess the Lord is answering my prayers and showing me anything not HIM that I worship.

Turns out, it's me.

Sometimes it seems I'm never going to grow up.

And my eyes are growing dim,



  1. Isn't it interesting how we lie to protect ourselves, to hide things about ourselves that we don't want others to know--but it's the *lying* itself that exposes pieces of our heart that we *really* don't want others to see. It's hard growing up, isn't it? Growing up in Him? Growing up into who He's making us to be? Yes. Thank God for confession and forgiveness and starting over again. And again. And again. Love you, Friend.

  2. so glad we are growing up together, aren't you???