listening

listening

Monday, April 4, 2011

Freedom Fighting

Little tree.  Today there are what look like little cocoons hanging off every branch.  Thousands of little leaves hidden inside fuzzy sleeping bags.  I think how much it reminds me of the body of Christ.  All connected to the Vine.  Branches covered with new life and waiting to bear much fruit.

Things are hard in the house right now.  Hearts are breaking.  Consequences being lived out.  Responsibilities with skin on being laid across young backs.  Acceptance.  Resignation.  Struggling to see the light at the end of the hurt. 

And we know that butterflies must struggle to be free from their hiding place.  From their sheltering home.  Their wings don't work properly if they are helped, so in the pain, a mama has to learn to be quiet.  Shhh...silently watch and pray as a beloved child experiences heart break beyond a pen's describing reach. Hush.  When heart is howling.

Can a Mama trust God to be enough in the desperate hurting moments of her children?  After all, we are so far beyond kissing those owies better.  Spider Man bandages making barely bleeding cuts heal as we wink and smile.  No.  Wish it were so.  But no. 

We must struggle through to be truly free.  From sin.  Will we trust Jesus to get us there?  Do we have the strength in leg trunks to stand?  It?  The pressure?  The crushing pain of bare obedience?  Do we trust that His boundaries are good?  Protection.

And I?  Am I "man enough" to allow the teaching boards that will come across the bare behinds of my children?  Are you?  Am I ashamed of what mine have been?  Have they not been the greatest means of this passion I have for Him? The Saving One?  "She who has been forgiven much.  Loves much."  I do.

We don't want them to hurt.  And yet, they must do so.  They must.  And mamas everywhere must partake in their suffering as well.  Yet another opportunity for us to flee into the arms of the One Who knows and understands.  The One Who watches and sees.  All of it.  We fall on the bare spot in the carpet by our beds and wipe our leaking faces on the quilts that covered conception.  We pray that they will all find their way.  To HIM.  To Jesus.    To the only One Who can be light in hearts darkened by pain.  To the only One Who can make them truly free.   He is the way into the cocoon, and He is the way out.  He is the One Who makes their wings, and He is the One Who fills them with color.  Beauty.  He is the way.  He is the truth.  He is the life.  Oh!  That they all would reach for HIM!

"I am the light of the world.  If you follow me, you won't have to walk in darkness, because you will have the light that leads to life."  John 8:12

Bernadette

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